On Tuesday of Holy Week, as we approach the Passion, we are often spent. Lent has wrung us dry, we are expectant yet exhausted, and we long for the warm fuzzy feelings of different days. If we are to travel with Christ, we must have more than feelings to fuel our faith. George MacDonald, mentor of CS Lewis, while often a bit tangled in the tongue, reminds us to press on, whether we are riding the waves or the trenches.
Troubled soul, thou art not bound to feel, but thou art bound to arise. God loves thee whether thou feelest or not. Thou canst not love when thou wilt, but thou are bound to fight the hatred in thee to the last. Try not to feel good when thou art not good, but cry to Him who is good. He changes not because thou changest. Nay, He has an especial tenderness of love toward thee for that thou art in the dark and hast no light, and His heart is glad when thou dost arise and say, “I will go to my Father.”…
Fold the arms of thy faith, and wait in the quietness until light goes up in thy darkness. Fold the arms of thy Faith I say, but not of thy Action: bethink thee of something that thou oughtest to do, and go to do it, if it be but the sweeping of a room, or the preparing of a meal, or a visit to a friend. Heed not thy feeling: Do thy work.
~ George MacDonald, An Anthology, (#39, Troubled Soul)
It is not our job (nor should it be our expectation) to feel good feelings. It is our job to fight the darkness, to seek the light, and to do good work.
May you seek in the darkness what you know to be true in the light,